We have been living on a budget for nearly 5 years and we have made so many changes to our lifestyle. We have had many budget slip ups and bumps along the way. There have been so many unforeseen circumstances and only now, 5 years later, do we have a clear vision of what we want our future to look like.
Unless you have a very clear vision for your future and even still – your goals and path may change drastically.
When we began living on a single income we were engaged, had no children and lived in a small apartment just outside of Boston. Now, just under 5 years later, we are married with two children and just sold our townhome to live in an overpriced apartment just outside of Tampa, Florida and still living on a single income.
It amazes us to think back that it has been just 5 years because we have gone through so many changes and milestones in our relationship and family. A wedding, a work injury, our first child, a new car, an out-of-state move, our first house, our second child, job changes, two new cars, selling our first house, another move…
There have been so many periods of uncertainty and constant fluctuating income. It has been a roller coaster to say the least. Our anxieties have definitely been offered a lot of fuel for their fires.
Through all of these changes, some that maybe should have been thought through more carefully and some we wouldn’t change for the world, we have learned so much about ourselves.
- We have learned what we truly need to survive.
- We have learned the things that make us truly happy and we don’t want to be without.
- We have learned to make the most of everything we do have and to stop chasing what everyone else has. Though this can still be so challenging.
- We finally nailed down where we see ourselves in the next 5 years and we are ready to buckle down and achieve it.
I wanted to share some of the lifestyle changes we have made over the past 5 years to live within or below our means in order for me to stay home with our children and still reach for our financial goals.
There are changes we have made to stick to and also as a result of being on a budget that has been ever-changing. But all are contributing factors to our continued success.
None of this could have been possible without D’s hard work and constant drive to make the best life he can for our little family. It has not been an easy task for him and I can never express my gratitude for him enough.
I have considered many times over the years to return to work in order to alleviate the pressure on our sole-provider, but with the costs of childcare along with other factors the value just hasn’t been enough for us to make that switch.
Instead we have given up our expensive habits and replaced them with affordable alternatives. If you are working hard to stay on a budget – whether it is to payoff debt, be able to stay-at-home with children or just to be able to cover your bills – here are some things that we have done that may help you as well.
Lifestyle changes we’ve made to stay on budget
We don’t have date nights
I do NOT recommend this one. Date nights are so important for your relationship. It is so important to invest time and money into connecting with your S.O. If it means paying for childcare for a few hours to enjoy dinner together once a month, do it.
We went for a very long time without date nights. On occasion, we would plan for special date nights at home – things like cooking together, movie nights after the kids went to bed and sometimes splurging on childcare to spend some time alone.
We eat healthy
If the thought of eating healthy gives you visions of pricey organic produce, that doesn’t have to be the case. In fact, we save money by eating healthy. And that’s not to say we don’t eat fast food or junk ever. Our primary grocery shopping is done on the outer perimeter of the store – produce, meats, bakery, dairy. You will save a lot of money by avoiding processed and prepackaged food and snacks.
We shop where the food is cheapest
We used to have favorite grocery stores because they were convenient and offered all of the newest and “best” products. Now we drive a little further for the best prices. We have grown fond of Aldi because of its lower prices and variety of products. If you have a produce market or butcher shop nearby I highly recommend checking out their prices. I have found the quality and variety is usually so much better and more affordable. Plus, a lot of the produce is typically more local!
We don’t eat out often
We try to limit eating out to once a week and it is usually pizza or some other take-out. There are definitely some weeks where we skip shopping or are both too tired to cook and we go overboard. They are definitely less often and we make a conscious effort to avoid it.
We don’t buy clothes very often
We pretty much wear our clothes until they are no longer acceptable to be seen in public. For us, this means we strive for a smaller wardrobe with higher quality items that will last us a long time. We used to have an abundance of low-priced and even lower quality clothing. But higher quality items do cost more so we don’t buy new things often. Every once in a while I will do a larger shopping trip to refresh or replenish clothing we need. It’s very rare though.
We don’t go shopping often
My weakness has always been a nice leisurely stroll through Marshall’s or Target and finding great deals. I would often justify shopping sprees by reporting how much I saved by purchasing only items on clearance. But to be honest these trips rarely were based on things we needed. Though we both enjoy shopping trips we have had to scale back immensely. After so many years we understand that the thrill of shopping isn’t helping us meet our goals.
We shop second hand
Now we shop second hand for household items, furniture and clothing. Thrifting isn’t always as glamorous as the internet makes it out to be, but we have found many treasures this way. In fact, the majority of our furniture is second hand. For clothing, I often shop on Poshmark for something specific but have also come across some unexpected scores in thrift stores. We also have an excellent children’s consignment shop nearby where I have found many great gently used or brand new items. I will say, not all thrift or consignment shops are alike so if you have been turned off by one don’t let it deter you from checking out another.
We streamlined our cleaning supplies
Maybe this isn’t one of the first things that comes to mind – it certainly wasn’t for us – but since switching over to fewer chemicals we save a lot of money on cleaning supplies. We primarily use diluted white vinegar as an all purpose cleaner and hydrogen peroxide as a disinfectant (you can put a spray bottle right on the HP bottle and use it directly from there). These two products are so inexpensive I can buy them in bulk and not need to purchase cleaning supplies all year long. On top of that we have also replaced paper towels in our home with reusable, washable cloths and haven’t had to purchase those either. Little expenses add up!
We don’t take expensive trips
We haven’t really had family vacations over the last 5 years, outside of some long weekends, until this past year. With job switching and D needing to use his vacations for the births of our children we never really had the option to take an extended trip. When we do get to take trips, whether for 1 night or 5, we look for our most affordable options. Travel is so important to us and though it is currently restricted to more local, affordable options we are not ready to forgo it completely now that we have the opportunity.
We find free or affordable activities
A large part of why we wanted to move back to Florida was because of the abundance of things to do with our kids. We try to stick to free or affordable things and luckily there is no shortage of parks nearby. While we do visit Walt Disney World often, we have Florida resident annual passes and our children are still free, and we are blessed to have this as an option. We will often opt for annual passes versus one-time visits because in the long run they make more sense financially – so we also have tickets for the zoo and Busch Gardens.
We are (probably) known as the cheap friends/family members
Ok I cannot confirm this but I can probably say that our friends and family members think of us as cheap. Since moving to Florida we have not afforded a trip back home to visit – we’ve looked into it many times but paying over $1,500 for a weekend scares us off. We turn down many invites from friends to do things that we know are just not in our budget. Though we try to send thoughtful gifts they are often not extravagant and have occasionally been replaced with a simple phone call, but this is something we hope to be able to change in the future when our budget allows it. I should say, no one has ever said anything directly but I can’t help but wonder…
Budgeting has become second nature to us over the years. We make plenty of mistakes and overspend here and there more often that we would like to admit. At times it can be incredibly stressful and trying on ourselves and on our relationship.
There are so many times that we want to say f*ck this – let’s just stay in debt forever. To tell you the truth, if we weren’t so dead set on wanting to be debt free we could live quite comfortably right now. But we always come back to the same realization that we are doing this now in order to have a better future for ourselves and our family.
If you are struggling to stay on a budget – you are not alone. If you are not already I recommend following along with the #debtfreecommunity for inspiration and ideas to continue to stay disciplined. You’ll be surprised to see how many people are sticking to tight budgets, finding sources of extra income and trying to stay motivated through the slip ups.